My Least Favorite Teacher

I'm going to put it as plainly as I can. This dude was crazy. He's so crazy that I can't even attempt to remember an actual conversation I have held with him, so I'm just going to share some memories.

He was a monotonous math teacher that I had the privilege of being taught by for three of my four years of high school. He enjoyed being boring. He enjoyed it so much in fact, that he had discovered ways to hold our attention while no breaking from his boring nature. How? Several ways. The first, was on random days, for no reason, he would start and end class in a headstand... I have nothing to say to follow up on that statement besides it is needless to say that the first time you walk into a class room and your teacher in standing on his head in the front of the room... you're a little concerned for his sanity.

The second strange thing he does, or did, I don't know if he is still teaching or not. Is if he feels the class is drifting too far into their own thoughts, he would suddenly jump up, knocking his chair to the floor with a bang, and just stand there as we all gawked at his random action. He would stand there in silence for several seconds before picking up his chair, taking his seat, and begin to teach again as if nothing had ever happened. Granted, it got our attention. However, we still weren't paying attention to what he was teaching.

And lastly (and most shocking in my opinion) was his need... no, his obsession with white chalk. While most teachers opted for upgraded whiteboards and markers in their classrooms, he insisted on keeping his chalk board and pure white chalk. To this day, no one knows why he is obsessed with white chalk, but his actions only cement his mental love affair with the writing utensil. You see... one day, by pure mistake, he was given a box of yellow chalk to use. He, this quiet, monotone man, gasped so dramatically that we thought something was seriously wrong with him and jumped out of our seats to see if he was okay. Upon realizing he was only reacting to his discovery of the yellow chalk, we were left beyond confused. Then our confusion turned to absolute shock when he started to shake in rage as he ripped open the box and ate the yellow chalk in protest... Yes. He ate the chalk because it was not white.

Like I said, this dude was crazy. There is nothing you could tell me to make me believe otherwise.